3 men were waiting in line to enter heaven
The angel at the gate asks the first man “how many times did you cheat on your wife?” “10 times” the man answers. The angel gives him the keys to…Read more »
The boss wondered why one of his most valued employees was absent, but had not phoned in.
Needing to have an urgent work problem resolved, he dialed the employee’s home phone number and was greeted by a child’s whisper, “Hello.” “Is your Mummy home?” he asked. “Yes,”…Read more »
A funeral service is being held in a synagogue for a woman who has just passed away.
At the end of the service, the pall bearers are carrying the casket out when they accidentally bump into a wall jarring the casket. They hear a faint moan. They…Read more »
A woman is badly burned in a car accident and requires a skin graft on her face.
Because of her injuries the doctors are unable to take skin from any part of her body, so they must rely on a donor. Her husband of 25 years volunteers…Read more »
A bouncer is working on a Saturday night at a popular nightclub for household utensils…
… One of the regulars, a mirror, comes outside for a smoke and greets him. As they make small talk, a toilet approaches flaunting a pristine gold plated lid. The…Read more »
The woman says: “Doctor, I don’t know what to do.
Every day my husband seems to lose his temper for no reason. It scares me.” The Doctor says: “I have a cure for that. When it seems that your husband…Read more »
Dad: “I want you to marry a girl of my choice.” Son: “No.” Dad: “The girl is Bill Gate’s daughter.” Son: “Then Ok!” ** ** Dad goes to Bill Gates….Read more »
A dwarf with a lisp goes to visit a stud farm.
“I’d like to buy a horth” He says to the owner of the farm. “What sort of horse?” Said the owner. “A female horth” The dwarf replies. So the owner…Read more »
Two physicians boarded a flight out of Seattle.
One sat in the window seat, the other sat in the middle seat. Just before takeoff, an attorney got on and took the aisle seat next to the two physicians….Read more »
A gorilla dies of old age at a zoo right before the zoo opens. It is the only gorilla at the zoo since they are not very profitable.
However, the gorilla is their most popular attraction by far, and they can’t afford to go a day without it. So the zoo owner asks one of his workers to…Read more »