Little Johnny

Little Johnny is in school one day when his teacher tells the class that she wants to hear each of them say a little about their families, and specifically what…

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The Queen’s breasts

Once upon a time there lived a beautiful Queen with large breasts. Sid, the Dragon Slayer, obsessed over the Queen for this reason. He knew that the penalty for his…

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A United States Marine was deployed to Afghanistan. While he was there he received a “Dear John” letter from his girlfriend.

In the letter she explained that she had slept with two guys while he had been gone and she wanted to break up with him. To add injury to the…

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A young couple get married and have their first night together in their new home.

As they are undressing for bed, the husband hands the wife his pants. “Here, try these on,” he says. “What? Why?” she says. “Just put them on,” he insists. “They’re…

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3 men die and go to Heaven

St Peter meets them and starts reviewing their files. He starts talking to the first guy: “I see that you lived a good life, but you cheated on your wife…

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HELL EXPLAINED

The following is an actual question given on a University of Arizona chemistry midterm, and an actual answer turned in by a student. The answer by one student was so…

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Two women go to heaven and meet St Peter

He told the two women you can do anything you want here in heaven but please do not step on a duck because they make a terrible noise and racket….

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God is creating the world, and he talks to the Canadians

He says to them “You will have the best land ever. It is beautiful, in the summer it is warm and in the winter it snows beautiful snow flakes. It…

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Two men are walking their dogs (a doberman and a chihuahua) when they see a restaurant.

They’re pretty hungry, do they decide to head in for a bite to eat. Unfortunately, they see a sign out front that says “NO DOGS ALLOWED”. The man with the…

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A man dies, and wakes up on a beach…

There are girls playing beach volleyball, barbeques everywhere, laughter and joy. All of a sudden, Satan comes up to him. “Welcome to hell. Enjoy yourself, have a drink, have a…

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