I went to the pet shop and the owner said he had a talking centipede for sale.
I said ‘no way, centipedes don’t talk.’ The owner promised me it was a talking centipede so I purchased it and took it home with me. A little later in…
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Yoda and Luke are walking through the swamp
Part of their usual training course involves shimmying along a cliff ledge, but today, there’s a long break in the ledge they can’t cross… “Something for this I have.” Yoda…
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In an African tribe village, the chieftain’s wife gave birth to a white skinned child.
The chieftain quickly figured the voluntary doctor from Europe might be to blame. So the chieftain asked him to talk in his tent. Chieftain: “Today my wife gave birth to…
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Bubba died in a fire and his body was burned pretty badly.
The morgue needed someone to identify the body, so they sent for his two best friends, Darryl and Gary. The three men had always done everything together! Darryl arrived first…
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It’s getting crowded in heaven, so one day Saint Peter decides to only accept people who make him laugh.
A man came walking up to the Pearly Gates, and Saint Peter said to him: “Alright bud, you’re only getting in today if you can make me laugh, so why…
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John gets pulled over on the highway for speeding… (funny jokes)
John: “Is there a problem officer?” Cop: “You exceeded 80 in 55 zone. May I see your license?” John: “ahhhh, why don’t I spare you the trouble, officer? I don’t…
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A lost dog strays into a jungle.
A lion sees this from a distance and says with caution “this guy looks edible, never seen his kind before”. So the lion starts rushing towards the dog with menace….
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