I think, I’m going to lose my drivers license…

and all just because of a stupid police officer… The conversation went like this, when I got pulled over in my car: Officer: “License and registration, please, I think you…

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Little Johnny

Little Johnny is in school one day when his teacher tells the class that she wants to hear each of them say a little about their families, and specifically what…

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The Queen’s breasts

Once upon a time there lived a beautiful Queen with large breasts. Sid, the Dragon Slayer, obsessed over the Queen for this reason. He knew that the penalty for his…

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A United States Marine was deployed to Afghanistan. While he was there he received a “Dear John” letter from his girlfriend.

In the letter she explained that she had slept with two guys while he had been gone and she wanted to break up with him. To add injury to the…

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A young couple get married and have their first night together in their new home.

As they are undressing for bed, the husband hands the wife his pants. “Here, try these on,” he says. “What? Why?” she says. “Just put them on,” he insists. “They’re…

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HELL EXPLAINED

The following is an actual question given on a University of Arizona chemistry midterm, and an actual answer turned in by a student. The answer by one student was so…

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Two women go to heaven and meet St Peter

He told the two women you can do anything you want here in heaven but please do not step on a duck because they make a terrible noise and racket….

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God is creating the world, and he talks to the Canadians

He says to them “You will have the best land ever. It is beautiful, in the summer it is warm and in the winter it snows beautiful snow flakes. It…

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The Bathtub Test

During a visit to the mental asylum, I asked the director how do you determine whether or not a patient should be institutionalized. “Well” said the director, “we fill up…

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A guy calls a company and orders their 5-day, 5lbs weight loss program.

A guy calls a company and orders their 5-day, 5lbs weight loss program. The next day, there’s a knock on the door and there stands before him a voluptuous, athletic,…

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