{"id":2218,"date":"2020-04-06T07:01:45","date_gmt":"2020-04-06T07:01:45","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.getfunwith.com\/story\/?p=2218"},"modified":"2020-05-15T09:03:49","modified_gmt":"2020-05-15T09:03:49","slug":"a-monkey-is-smoking-a-joint","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.getfunwith.com\/story\/a-monkey-is-smoking-a-joint\/","title":{"rendered":"A monkey is smoking a joint"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p>A monkey is sitting in a tree, smoking a joint, when a lizard walks past. The lizard looks up and says &#8220;Hey, what are you doing?&#8221; The monkey says &#8220;Smoking a joint. Come up and join me&#8221;<\/p>\n\n\n\n <div style=\"margin-top:50px; margin-bottom:5px; text-align:center; color:#c1bdbd;\">ADVERTISEMENT<\/div>\r\n<script async src=\"https:\/\/pagead2.googlesyndication.com\/pagead\/js\/adsbygoogle.js\"><\/script>\r\n<!-- Jokes -->\r\n<ins class=\"adsbygoogle\"\r\n     style=\"display:block\"\r\n     data-ad-client=\"ca-pub-6695910881285465\"\r\n     data-ad-slot=\"9339555086\"\r\n     data-ad-format=\"auto\"\r\n     data-full-width-responsive=\"true\"><\/ins>\r\n<script>\r\n     (adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || []).push({});\r\n<\/script>\r\n<\/br><\/br><\/br>\n\n\n\n<p>So the lizard climbs up and sits next to the monkey, and they have another joint. After a while, the lizard says his mouth is &#8216;dry&#8217;, and that he&#8217;s going to get a drink from the river.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>At the riverbank, the lizard is so stoned that he leans over too far and falls in. A crocodile sees this and swims over to the stoned lizard, helping him to the side.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>He then asks the lizard &#8220;What&#8217;s the matter with you!?&#8221; The lizard explains that he was up in the tree, smoking a joint with the monkey and his mouth got dry, and that he was so wasted that, when he went to get a drink from the river, he fell in!<\/p>\n\n\n\n <div style=\"margin-top:50px; margin-bottom:5px; text-align:center; color:#c1bdbd;\">ADVERTISEMENT<\/div>\r\n<script async src=\"https:\/\/pagead2.googlesyndication.com\/pagead\/js\/adsbygoogle.js\"><\/script>\r\n<!-- Jokes -->\r\n<ins class=\"adsbygoogle\"\r\n     style=\"display:block\"\r\n     data-ad-client=\"ca-pub-6695910881285465\"\r\n     data-ad-slot=\"9339555086\"\r\n     data-ad-format=\"auto\"\r\n     data-full-width-responsive=\"true\"><\/ins>\r\n<script>\r\n     (adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || []).push({});\r\n<\/script>\r\n<\/br><\/br><\/br>\n\n\n\n<p>The inquisitive crocodile says he has to check this out. He walks into the jungle and finds the tree where the monkey is sitting, finishing a joint.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>He looks up and says &#8220;Hey, MONKEY!&#8221;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>The monkey looks down and says &#8220;OMG! DUUUUDE &#8230;. HOW MUCH WATER DID YOU DRINK?!&#8221;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image is-resized\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"http:\/\/www.getfunwith.com\/story\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/04\/jokePin-5-683x1024.png\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-2220\" width=\"64\" height=\"96\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.getfunwith.com\/story\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/04\/jokePin-5-683x1024.png 683w, https:\/\/www.getfunwith.com\/story\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/04\/jokePin-5-200x300.png 200w, https:\/\/www.getfunwith.com\/story\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/04\/jokePin-5.png 735w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 64px) 100vw, 64px\" \/><\/figure>\n<!-- AddThis Advanced Settings generic via filter on the_content --><!-- AddThis Share Buttons generic via filter on the_content -->","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>A monkey is sitting in a tree, smoking a joint, when a lizard walks past. The lizard looks up and says &#8220;Hey, what are you doing?&#8221; The monkey says &#8220;Smoking&#8230; <!-- AddThis Advanced Settings generic via filter on get_the_excerpt --><!-- AddThis Share Buttons generic via filter on get_the_excerpt --><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":2220,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[32],"tags":[34,15],"class_list":["post-2218","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-jokes","tag-jokes","tag-lol"],"amp_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.getfunwith.com\/story\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2218","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.getfunwith.com\/story\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.getfunwith.com\/story\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.getfunwith.com\/story\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.getfunwith.com\/story\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2218"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"https:\/\/www.getfunwith.com\/story\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2218\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":2319,"href":"https:\/\/www.getfunwith.com\/story\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2218\/revisions\/2319"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.getfunwith.com\/story\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/2220"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.getfunwith.com\/story\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2218"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.getfunwith.com\/story\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2218"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.getfunwith.com\/story\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2218"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}